Which jacket should I not get?

All of them.

I was in a hardoff in Kawasaki yesterday, looking at buying a nice cheap used ski jacket. It's cold outside.
I didn't find many I liked but I did see so many nasty examples of fashion.

Here's a selection:

Kind of looks like I've been peppered with bullets from the uzi of the fashion police. Perhaps the company had material left over from various jackets and decided to pump out just one more.

Kong:

Perhaps I should have mimicked the pose on the jacket, but it was pretty embarrassing at the time, so I wasn't thinking that clearly. Also, as soon as I was trying to take some photos, people would appear out of nowhere and walk into my shot.It was so frustrating. Someone would look down the ailse, see me trying to take a photo, then walk in front of the camera, or look at a jacket smack between the camera and I, then walk off after the timer goes off. They had no intention of buying a jacket. I think it's the same mentality here that people, when they see a long queue, automatically want to join it, as they think there must be something good at the end. If you've ever tried to get a crispy creme donut over here, you'll understand. It's insane. People queuing for HOURS, for a piece of crap that they ASSUME must be amazing, because so many other idiots are queuing up for it!

"Ooooh! I hate those people!!!!!"

One woman in particular was a frustration. The bloody cleaner. I swear she came through my shot 3 times in less than ten minutes. The store is huge. She can't possibly have covered the entire floor surface in three minutes. What's more, I'd been at the other end of the store, 5 minutes previously and she'd passed me twice then! Sweeping right where I was standing. Either she is a complete idiot with zero social skills (look who's talking/listen to who's typing), or she is an evil genius matermind who, in between plotting to destroy the world, delights in tormenting frustrated foreigners, trying to take photos of themselves wearing ridiculous ski jackets.How did she get across the floor so fast? Was she following me? Was she part of a clone cleaner conspiracy? If I were to climb up above the aisle of jackets, would I see a veritable army of cloned cleaners, slowly cleaning in concentric circles, covering the complete store? I have to change my keyboard now, I seem to have damaged the c key.

So, I finally managed to get a shot with the yellow jacket.

The color wasn't so bad, but the English was.
8-beat. Expectation that nature.

Answers please, on a stamped, addressed postcard.

In Russia, men wear interesting colors and try to look happy and carefree:

...and if someone laughs, zen we destroy them.

Here's a nice one. I was trying to get my version of the classic look 'Blue Steel'.
However, I think I just look like I'm trying to molest a walrus.I call this one 'The Tangerine Molester'.

Scary.

Here's a good one. Parents, don't let your kids near this man.
I think the owner of this jacket was violently sick across it, but I can't be sure where.Quite an explosion of colors here. I think it helps if you're off your face on high end drugs.

Finally, a jacket to test your camera's color balance by:It shall be replacing the old color test, for the BBC:

But the runaway winner, ladies and gentlemen, is this masterpiece,
simply refeered to as 'Hey Boy':Classic. I can see people furiously skiing away from me on the piste, if I go out wearing this number. At least I should have no trouble finding a spare seat at the cafeteria.

One jacket-pants combination that I did find was a great deal was this:Seemed to be in reasonable condition. The set for only 3,500yen. Not bad. Alas, too small for my portly frame. Never mind. I know a few Canadians who may be interested.

Saying that, there may be a more suitable jacket for me:


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